The Real Meaning of Life

Kampong Leaeng district is located in Kampong Chhnang Province just north of Cambodia’s capital, Phnom Penh. Although one may view this area as land locked on a map, there’s a major river that runs along the west side and marshlands with no roads on the east side. Locals refer to it as an island due to access being limited to boat over the Tonle Sap River from the west. This so called “island” is where I was born on May 13, 1985.  My name is Sopharemetrey Khem but most people call me “Metrey” (which sounds like “Met-try”). I am a 35 year old Cambodian national, devoted husband, father of five children and pastor with FCOP Cambodia. Although most that might meet me now would think my life has been a success story, there was a time that I never thought I’d make it. It was only by the grace of God, a God I hadn’t met yet in my early teens, that helped me survive the hardest days of my life.

My childhood was typical of that time. Cambodia was still reeling from the effects of civil war and genocide. We were poor and lived a simple life as compared to today but that was about average in our area. One ongoing challenge we faced was that we lived on this island that was in the middle of flood plains.  So, for about six months out of the year, we would literally pick up our home, a little bamboo stilted room, and move it to higher land where we wouldn’t be flooded out. There were six of us that lived in this little room including my dad and mom, two brothers, one sister and myself.  I was the youngest.

My parents were farmers but my dad also worked part time at the primary school as a teacher and school principal. Although our small plot of land was about an acre, we were in an area that had good water access and fertile soil. We rotated crops and planted all year round. We would travel by boat a couple times a month to sell our harvests at the market on the mainland. When I was old enough to go to school, I traveled with my father to the school and enjoyed studying. My brothers were quite a bit older than me and they married and moved away, eventually leaving just my sister and I at home with our parents.

In January of 1999, when I was 13 years old, my life drastically took a turn for the worse when my father passed away.  It is not exactly clear what caused his illness but it was generally believed to be from liver failure. It went undiagnosed due to a lack of access to any kind of doctor or hospital in the area where we lived and no means to travel far enough to get the help he needed.  Without any time to process or recover from his death, my family’s economic situation went from bad to worse in an instant. Our provisions were already day to day with some days not having enough food but became impossible after his passing.  We went from simple, low nutrient meals of soup broth and rice to no meals at all some days.  My mom and sister continued to farm and the local community, including the school took a special offering to help our family but it wasn’t enough to last. We started staying up through the night to hunt for frogs, snakes and fish as we didn’t have the means to buy food at the market. For nearly nine months we saw our health deteriorate as we all lost weight, started becoming sick and couldn’t figure out what to do.

In September of 1999, my mother and sister urged me to visit an uncle across the river to try to figure out a way to get me back to school in hopes that I could help the family by getting a job that could supplement our income better than farming.  The area we lived in did not have a secondary level high-school, so the next time we crossed the river my uncle took me to the school in his village. The school said they would wave some of the fees because they knew of my father but I would have to find a way to buy my own school supplies. My uncle said he couldn’t afford it or to feed and house me as they were suffering also. Just before he was going to take me back home, he said he had heard of a place that might be able to help. I had no idea what it was at the time, but would soon find out it was a church.

Ph’er Refuge Center was a church located in the capital of Kampong Chhnang Province that has taken care of orphaned and abandoned children for nearly 20 years and was finished being built in 2001.  Before the church building was completed, when my uncle took me there, it was just a church group that met in an open field under a thatched roof.  The church members had started to work together, pooling their resources to help children in the area that had nowhere to go. After my uncle spoke to the pastor, the church agreed to help. Word was sent to my family across the river, to which my mother answered and said I wasn’t allowed to go home until I finished school. I soon started ninth grade.

Through this church group I was able to start school again but that wasn’t the only blessing. The simple opportunity to have three meals a day with a full belly was something I hadn’t experienced in a while. Although I didn’t like to talk about it, the death of my father was hard on my mother and our family. Life at home was extremely difficult. Everybody felt burdened by each other and no one knew what to do. This group of people from across the river that were willing to help take care of some of us community kids and support our effort to go to school provided a good family environment. Within about a year, they built a building and helped care for us kids like we were a family. We had chores to do but that was nothing in comparison to the workload of farming I had before. The home director, whom we collectively and affectionately called dad, wanted us kids to focus on school, build friendships and help the community around us.

As I continued to grow up, I began to discern and ask more questions regarding life. When I asked our dad, the home director, why he takes on the responsibility and stresses of raising orphaned and abandoned children, he explained to me how accepting Jesus Christ into his heart gave him a new perspective on life. As I began to learn more about Jesus, I realized I wanted to accept him into my own heart. In December 2000, I made the single best decision of my life and accepted Jesus into my heart while we were at a conference in the coastal city of Kampong Som.

By the time I was graduating high school, I had started spreading the word about Jesus and was leading people to receive Jesus, be baptized and also saw healings and people released from spiritual oppression. A desire was growing in my heart to continue doing this. I also wanted to honor my father and his passing, so I took an exam when graduating high school to see if I would be accepted into a public school teacher training program. I was accepted but I couldn’t shake the idea of wanting to also help orphaned and abandoned children and continue spreading the message of Jesus. I received word through my church home dad, that if I wanted to go to Bible School to learn more about the Bible and train to be a pastor, there was a scholarship being offered through FCOP’s office in Phnom Penh, the headquarters of the church home I was raised in. This was very exciting to me. I immediately accepted the offer. I didn’t know it at the time but accepting this offer would lead to a dream come true for me, to care for others in our community and tell people about the message of Jesus.  When I finished Bible school I accepted an offer to become a pastor in training with FCOP and eventually became a pastor. In addition to telling people about Jesus, I have helped be FCOP’s local staff, providing for poor and destitute families, as well as, raising children that had nowhere to go in our church home.

Prior to attending Bible school, during my days off from high school, I would travel up and down the Tonle Sap River to other communities to tell people about Jesus. We were so excited to see people accept Jesus that when we were preparing to leave for another village, I forgot my long sleeve shirt that I would wear during travel to keep the hot sun off of my skin. I assumed I had lost it until a few months later we revisited that same village where I had left it. When we arrived, I was greeted by a young woman about my age, and she gave the shirt back to me. Forgetting that it was mine, I thought it was a gift. After she explained I had left it, I remembered and we had a good laugh. We still laugh about that story to this day. Little did we know it at that time, but that was the beginning of a friendship that eventually led to marriage and a family. God has blessed me with five children and an amazing wife. It doesn’t stop there. We live and are a family with all the children that come to live at our church home. There is truly no noticeable difference in our everyday lives between my own kids and orphaned and abandoned children living in our church home. We are a big, happy family.

There has never been a thought in my mind about quitting. I truly love being a part of the FCOP family, our church, and what we’ve been able to do for our community. It started with me realizing that my dad at the church home was doing what he did to raise us, together with his wife, because of Jesus’ impact on his life. Then, after accepting Jesus, together with my orphan home brothers and sisters, we saw God work through us to provide for those around us. Sometimes provision comes through God doing a miracle and sometimes it’s as simple as giving our own clothes and food away. Either way, God has provided a way in every challenge and every situation. That is undeniable. I am blessed to understand the real meaning of life, loving others.

Together with my family, we have one goal; to bring people to Jesus and plant churches. We’ve loved doing it this long and want to keep doing it forever. Jesus is the answer for Cambodia and Jesus is the answer for the world! Please join me in praying for my own family to receive Jesus. My older sister and a nephew have received Jesus already but we keep contending for my mother, brothers and extended family. God bless you!

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